Question:
2. If someone invites you to join party or have dinner together, Could you say NO?
3. If you get trouble with someone, Could you blame or walk away from that person right away?
4. If someone asks to borrow something from you, Could you say NO immediately?
Answer: If you could not reject or say NO right away, BE my guests “You Are Thais”
Even me, I also could not reject or say NO on those questions. I do not understand why Thais do not say NO if they disagree or do not want to do that thing. It just because of “Kreng Jai” (Considerate), on English dictionary cannot describe meaning of this word exactly, only considerate which cannot clarify well.
Nevertheless, Thais really fixes on “Kreng Jai” word, it might because of we were educated from our generation. It seems good because it could present how nice of Thais. On the other hand, Thais need to suffer and pressure to do what they exactly do not want to do or want to reject something but they cannot.
To complete this issue, I would like to share my view on word “Kreng jai” I always get trouble with this word because I never say no to someone who asks for my assistant. At my work place, I was requested to do everything without limit even buy stuff for housekeeping. Sometime, I felt bored and tired from work and study but I need to do! It is because I did not reject to do it at first!
Even though I knew that “Kreng Jai”word make me trouble sometimes, but the truth, I still could not change my behavior and I am sure that a lot Thais also could not change as well!
I agree that 'Kreng Jai' is very much a part of the Thai culture and can be the source of considerable cultural mis-communication. Unlike you there are many people that may be kreng jai about rejecting a request or suggestion directly, but will simply not execute on it later - and then offer a reason/excuse post facto. It is this disconnect between what is said or not said and what is done or not done that can be very hard for a foriegner to understand. That said, when in Thailand I think it is the responsibility of the foriegner to understand this concept and learn about this concept and how it operates in this culture.
ReplyDelete